“Saturday Night Live’s” goofy Donald Trump (James Austin Johnson) positively gushes about his “epic” Cabinet picks in the program’s scathing cold open in a spoof of his meeting with Joe Biden (Dana Carvey). “They are some of the most dynamic, free-thinking, animal killing, sexually criminal, medically crazy people in the country,” Trump preens.
“Who are you thinking about?” asks Biden.
Trump boasts: “We’ve got Elon Musk and Matt Gaetz. That’s an alien vs. predator. We’ve got Kristi Noem and RFK Jr. They’re killing the dogs, they’re killing the bears. And Melania will be working remotely from divorce.”
Former Rep. Gaetz, picked by the real Trump to be attorney general despite being investigated by the Justice Department for sex trafficking (the probe was dropped), quit the House last week after his nomination, ending another probe by the House Ethics Committee also into allegations of sex trafficking involving a minor.
Gaetz (played by Sarah Sherman) pops up to explain to the men: “I had to resign from Congress because the confirmation process comes at the busiest time of the year for me … girls volleyball season.”
Carvey squirms, saying this “guy gives me the ‘ick.'”
“Me too,” admits Johnson’s Trump, “but I think he’s going to be terrific!”
Biden accuses Trump of “picking a bunch of wacko jackos to test out how compliant the Senate will be with your policies.”
“Yep, that’s what I am doing. It’s all part of a very smart plan that I definitely thought of before you just said that,” Trump tells him.
Health and Human Services head nominee Robert F. Kennedy Jr., played by Alec Baldwin, also stops by, underscoring his opposition to vaccines.
“I care deeply about a woman’s right to choose — to choose to give her child polio,” he smiles.
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